The rain pelted down against the small window as you looked down at the broken man before you. He looked so small and fragile—no longer the powerful angel he once was. Seeing him like this broke your heart into pieces, but you knew that you had to be strong for him. He was supposed to be helping save the world, not laying motionless and weak in a hospital bed. All you wanted to do was hold him and cry.
“Oh, Cas,” you whispered, lightly moving back his hair from his damaged forehead.
Hours had passed and he was still unconscious. Worry and fear had suppressed all other emotions, never allowing a peaceful thought to cross your mind. No matter how hard you tried, the thought of Cas not making it out of this alive was always lingering in the back of your mind.
Over the few years you had known him, Castiel had become one of the most important things in your life. Whereas Sam and Dean were your family, Castiel was so much more than that: he was your everything. Although, he could be oblivious and completely unaware of your feelings, the two of you had a mutual unspoken understanding. Neither of you had to speak to know what the other was thinking. And this is what got the two of you where you were now.
Ever since you saw Castiel’s bloodied and unconscious body on the cold, hard ground, you couldn’t help but blame yourself. At that very moment, it seemed as though the whole world came crashing down. All that ran through your mind was the fact that Castiel had to be dead, and it was your fault.
That was what you had thought, anyway. Castiel may not have been dead, but he was still injured, still human, and it was all because he risked his life in an attempt to save yours. If it weren’t for him, you would be dead: pale as parchment and cold as stone. The thought alone sent shivers down your spine.
Taking a shaky breath, you sat down in the hard hospital chair you had positioned near Castiel’s bed earlier. No matter how long it would take you were determined to wait until he woke. As the minutes crawled by your eyelids became heavier and heavier. Just as you were about to close your eyes for good, you heard a rustling noise from beside you. Snapping your eyes open, you moved forward in your seat.
“Cas?” you asked, anxiously.
The man who was unconscious only a few moments ago groaned in response.
Relief washed over you: Castiel was going to be okay. “Thank God,” you murmured. “I’d thought I lost you.”
“I’m still here,” he said weakly, giving you a small smile.
Grasping his hand in your own, you bit your lip, a worried expression on your face. “How are you feeling?” you asked, concerned.
“I am thirsty and my head is pounding—I’ve got a bug bite that itches no matter how much I scratch it,” he said, scratching his bandaged arm.
Nodding you said, “I’ll go get one of the nurses for you.”
When you were about to get up you felt Castiel’s hand stop you. Turning your head, you saw that Castiel’s face, etched with pain. “Wait,” he croaked. “Don’t leave yet.”
“Cas,” you argued. “you’re in pain and they can help.”
“I’m fine,” he insisted. “Just please don’t leave me.”
Your heart ached for him and you couldn’t stand it. You left him to die and he still wanted to stay with you. Tears pricked your eyes. “I am so, so sorry, Cas,” you whispered, lip trembling. “It’s all my fault.” Warm, salty tears began to roll down your face.
“Hey,” he said, soothingly. “Don’t cry. None of it is your fault, ______.” Straining to wipe away the tears from your face, he gave you a sad look. “I don’t like seeing you sad.”
Sniffling, you nodded. “I’m sorry. I don’t mean to be sad, this should be happy. Look at you you’re awake!”
Looking away from you, Cas clenched his jaw. “And human,” he said quietly yet sternly.
Taking a sharp breath, you walked over to Castiel hold his hand. “But you’re still Castiel, and that’s all that matters,” you said, in hopes of comforting him.
He stayed quiet, not looking into your eyes.
Sighing you said, “Scoot over.”
Slightly confused, Castiel did as he was told, leaving enough room for you. Crawling into the hospital bed, you laid down next to Castiel, your body facing his. Burying your face into his chest, you listened to the sound of his heart through his hospital gown.
Apprehensive, Castiel stiffened. He never knew what to do in situations like these. But, after a few moments he relaxed and wrapped his arms around, holding you in a warm embrace. He pulled you tighter to him to the point where you were completely on your side, chest pressed to his side. His arm became your pillow while his hand rested behind you on your lower back.
Your hand tangled itself in his hair while the other rested on his heart, feeling it slow down to a peaceful beat.